Top 10 Excuses To Why You Didn't Respond To My IM

Thanks Nkechi for suggesting this.

First three by her:

1) "sorry, I just feel asleep...so tired!"
2) "sorry someone is knocking on my door...I think he's bleeding. no offense. ttyl"
3) "I have to go...ummm...nothing came up...you just suck."

4) "I've reported your last message to international authorities. You should be ashamed of yourself and what you did to that monkey"
5) "Sorry, not paying attention to you because I hate Jews"
6) "I'm uncomfortable watching you jerking off to that picture of me in a bikini on flickr"
7) "I'm not responding until you admit you were the one that made my privates itch"
8) "OMG; BFF! IMNECTHO, UR PWNED! FTW :)"
9) "Next time don't Twitter 'looking for booty call; talking to ugly bitch on IM'"
10) "Can't type; hands are covered in jizm and moisturizing cream"

Now one by Nikki:

11) "sorry, but after turning on my webcam i was inundated with ims from cuter boys and yours just got (conveniently) lost in a sea of cyber sex offers. i'm so popular, lolz!"

Good one!

WHAT ARE YOURSES?