I know, I know: "Matt, seriously, you play the Jew card too often". Well, I hate you.
I thought to myself this evening "I wonder what will come up if I google 'Jew' ", that was right after I thought to myself "Slash down the vein, not across", but that's a different story.
What did I find when I googled "Jew"? Check it out for yourself!
OK...so the second hit is "Jew Watch News", an affable, friendly site for Aryans and race-haters alike. They call themselves "[a] Scholarly Library of Facts about Domestic & Worldwide Zionist Criminality".
Well, that certainly sounds "Scholarly"! What "Scholars" prey-tell? Professor Hanz "Dyed Blond Pubic Hair" Klinkihoffer? International Relations Expert Joseph "Tickles" Kockinstuffer? Music producer Adolph Hitmaker?
On to hit number #7: this website is cleverly, one might even say subtly, called "THE INTERNATIONAL JEW - THE WORLD'S FOREMOST PROBLEM". Forget the global AIDS epidemic, poverty or deadly international culture wars; it's the JEWS that are the problem.
Actually, considering that we cause all of the above, I guess it makes sense. What? You didn't know that 10 evil Rabbis get together in a graveyard in Russia on the third Sunday in March to plan all the awful things that happen in the world over the year? Yes, they even plan hurricanes! Just don't tell water vapor evaporated from the ocean surface that!
You didn't know that? Well, I guess it's time for you to read The Protocols of the Elders of Zion! A book which literally says that and still is a top seller in the Middle East. In fact, here's a picture of the Syrian version:
Note the fine detail in the covetous hands and thick, evil eyebrows. Boy, isn't it completely true that Jews control everything, and literally have the world in the palm of their hand? That would certainly explain how we've avoided all forms of persecution throughout our history!
I would continue, but the bile in my stomach is churning. If you google "Catholic", "Buddhist" or even "MUSLIM"(in a post-9/11 America filled with bigoted morons!), you will not find a single Racist page amongst the first hits.
Why? Perhaps it's because we're so damn sexy? Perhaps it's easy to hate people who aren't like you when you hate yourself? Whatever the case, I am going to crack open the Manischewitz, put a schmear of cream cheese on my bagel, watch a Woody Allen movie and take a shvitz. Why? Because unlike the stereotype, I'm not a self-hating Jew!
Actually, I loathe myself, but that has nothing to do with the fact that I'm Jewish...
Note the fine detail in the covetous hands and thick, evil eyebrows. Boy, isn't it completely true that Jews control everything, and literally have the world in the palm of their hand? That would certainly explain how we've avoided all forms of persecution throughout our history!
I would continue, but the bile in my stomach is churning. If you google "Catholic", "Buddhist" or even "MUSLIM"(in a post-9/11 America filled with bigoted morons!), you will not find a single Racist page amongst the first hits.
Why? Perhaps it's because we're so damn sexy? Perhaps it's easy to hate people who aren't like you when you hate yourself? Whatever the case, I am going to crack open the Manischewitz, put a schmear of cream cheese on my bagel, watch a Woody Allen movie and take a shvitz. Why? Because unlike the stereotype, I'm not a self-hating Jew!
Actually, I loathe myself, but that has nothing to do with the fact that I'm Jewish...
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