Dear Dad,Seriously? You're a smart, handsome, physically strong, successful businessman with an astute understanding of high finance and a law degree. Why on earth did I only inherit your bad back and impatience with mindless conversation?
Sure, I could be running several successful businesses like you did, but hey, this whole "I can't stand small talk and OY! my back hurts" vibe is OK too.
Yeah, it's cool that you could bench press 300lbs when you were my age. But seriously, do I have to sweat when I eat?
Why take my sail boat out for a spin on an exclusive picturesque lake like you do on a weekly basis when I can be at a party, looking uncomfortable because the girl that's talking to me is really really boring? SHE'S PRETTY DAD!!! WHY DID YOU CURSE ME WITH A DISTASTE FOR THE MUNDANE???
Letter to my Mother:
Dear Mom,You sure are the best mom that a sonny could ask for; Caring, intellegent, selfless, and extremely pretty to boot. My question: Why did I only inherit your abilities to talk on and on about nothing and misplace common household items?
Sure, I could have articles written and videos made about my continuing efforts to help those who are mentally or terminally ill, but who wants that when I'm blabbering on about my missing socks with the last friend that can still bare to spend time with me?
Totally fine that I'm not a photographer's model like you were...but do I really have to be the guy who loses his keys every time he has to leave the house in a hurry? Where could I have got that from?...oh right, you.
Note: I love both my parents dearly and I know I've got some good things going on for myself. But seriously? I couldn't have inherited their better traits?
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