1) Nobody Loves You.
2) You Can Stop Staring At Those Hot Hipster Girls, You'll Never Have The Right Sweater-Vest For Them.
3) When You Wake Up, You Realize You Killed Your Only Friend; The Empty Bottle Of Black Velvet Whiskey.
4) Your Early 90's Hip-Hop Beats and Operatic Lead Vocals Never Quite Endeared You To People
5) OH GOD, WHY!!!!!! FUCK. I'M SO FUCKING ALONE!!!!
Hmmm...a bit of a downer tonight. I just got an email goodbye from a loyal reader of this blog who told me they'd be off the internets for 2 weeks and unable to keep up. Damnable! That's cut my daily readership from anywhere between 1-99.9999%
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