If you've bought an iPod Touch from a crackhead or some sort of ne'er-do-well in the Hollywood area, looked at the back, and noticed the engraved name "Michael Manson"; congratulations! You've purchased the iPod that was stolen from my car this weekend.It was a present from my father that I will gladly pay fair market value for, so if you have googled this page, please contact me at: cryingwhilemasturbating@gmail.com.
Also, if that person tries to sell you my gym membership, keep in mind they check your ID at the door, so it's pretty useless.
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